Am I An Elder Brother? Part 2
I was serving as Director of Music at a large church in the Philadelphia area when the Jim and Tammy Faye Baker fiasco broke. I walked into choir rehearsal and two of the men in the choir were ranting and raving about how the Bakers were such deceivers and should be totally ostracized for their behavior. The one man went on to same some pretty horrible things about the Bakers and then said, “You’d never catch me doing something that stupid!”
I can remember this as if it was yesterday. I made the statement — “Be very careful about statements like that because there go I but by the grace of God.” Within six months, this man’s whole world came crashing down.
Elder brothers tend to look down their noses at the prodigals. With our smugness and self-righteous pride, we declare, “How could you be so stupid?” I am have a clean track record and have never been caught doing something that dumb!” Really? Maybe not outwardly — but how about inwardly? Are you like the little child who was asked to sit down by his parents. He did, but thought in his mind, “I am sitting down on the outside, but I am standing up on the inside.”
Pastor Tim Keller, in his book THE PRODIGAL GOD, shares several more insights to help us diagnose if we are suffering from “EBS” — Elder Brother syndrome:
* Elder brothers are fastidious in their compliance to ethical norms, and in fulfillment of all traditional family, community, and civic responsibilities. But it is a slavish, joyless drudgery. The word “slave” has strong overtones of being forced or pushed rather than drawn or attracted. A slave works out of fear — fear of consequences imposed by force.
*Elder brother obedience only leads to a slavish begrudging compliance to the letter of the law.
*Elder brothers are being moral only for their own benefit. They may be kind to others and helpful to the poor, but at a deeper level they are doing it either so God will bless them, in the religious version of elder brotherness, or so they can think of themselves as virtuous, charitable persons, in the secular version of it.
*Elder brothers may do good to others, but not out of delight in the deeds themselves or for the love of people or the pleasure of God. They are not really feeding the hungry and clothing the poor, they are feeding and clothing themselves. The heart’s fundamental self-centeredness is not only kept intact but nurtured by fear-based moralism.
Elder brothers are under great pressure to appear, even to themselves, happy and content. This is the reason that sometimes highly moral elder brothers will blow up their lives and, to the shock of all who know them, throw off the chains of their obligations and begin living like younger brothers.
*Elder brothers may be disciplined in observing regular times of prayer, but their prayers are almost wholly taken up with a recitation of needs and petitions, not spontaneous, joyful praise.
*Elder brothers don’t go to God and beg for healing from their condition. They see nothing wrong with their condition. and that can be fatal. If you know you are sick you may go to the doctor; if you don’t know you’re sick — you won’t — you’ll just die.
*If you came to Christ out of being a younger brother, there is always the danger of partially relapsing into addictions or other younger brother sins. But if you’ve become a Christian out of being and elder brother, you can even more easily slide back into elder-brother attitudes and spiritual deadness. If you have not grasped the gospel fully and deeply, you will return to being condescending, condemning, anxious, insecure, joyless, and angry all the time.
And finally, Elder brothers have an undercurrent of anger toward life circumstances, hold grudges long and bitterly, look down at people of other races, religions, and lifestyles, experience life as a joyless, crushing drudgery, have little intimacy and joy in their prayer lives, a deep insecurity that makes them sensitive to criticism and rejection yet fierce and merciless in condemning others.
So I ask you — are you suffering from EBS? If so, it’s time to repent and come home. The Father is on tippy-toes looking for you to come home. And wow does He have the feast prepared for YOU! — Bill Welte is President and CEO of America’s KESWICK
God’s WORD for YOU: Proverbs 11; Leviticus 11-12; Matthew 26:1-25
Great Quote: One good man, one man who does not put on his religion once a week with his Sunday coat, but wears it for his working dress, and lets the thought of God grow into him, and through and through him, till everything he says and does becomes religious, that man is worth a thousand sermons — he is a living Gospel — he comes in the spirit and power of Elias — he is the image of God. And men see his good works,and admire them in spite of themselves, and see that they are God-like,and that God’s grace is no dream, but that the Holy Spirit is still among men, and that all nobleness and manliness is His gift, His stamp,His picture: and so they get a glimpse of God again in His saints and heroes, and glorify their Father who is in heaven. Charles Kingsley
